January 14, 2009
Chris Alford Update
January 13, 2009
Teens and Sexting
Have you heard of the latest teen fad called sexting (click on the title above to link to a news story of the latest episode)? I am just wondering, what is it in our culture and our society that drives teenage girls to send nude pictures of themselves to boys? I am not just trying to be edgy here, I am trying to understand this. Young ladies and men practicing exhibitionist behavior is not a new thing, but it used to be reserved for only a very small element of society. Now, however, this perverted practice is becoming commonplace in our local high schools and I am just trying to get in the head of a teenage girl who sends nude pics of herself to her boyfriend and others. I understand the technology side of it, that it is much easier to take a nude picture of yourself and send it to someone as opposed to 'getting naked' in front of them, just as it is easier for me to handle confrontation via email as opposed to handling it face to face (which is always a bad choice, by the way). But I still can't connect all of the dots . . . there has to be a major esteem issue involved in all of this. I realize that sexting definitely generates all kinds of attention from a bunch of hormone laced guys, but all of this attention is purely sex-based and totally degrading. So are these teens so starved for genuine affection that even degrading attention feels good?
As the father of 3 daughters, I try to keep my fingers on the pulse of society and how it is relating to girls in particular. In that pursuit, I recently read a book entitled Prude - How the Sex-Obsessed Culture Damages Girls (and America, Too!). It is written by an Ivy League attorney and columnist, Carol Platt Liebau. In this book she very shrewdly dissects our current culture and the incredible sexual pressure it puts on one of our most vulnerable possessions, our teenage girls. The book jacket says it all when it states, Over the last decade, a new female imperative - that sexiness trumps intelligence and character at even the highest levels of influence and power - has emerged, undermining girls' sense of worth in their formative years and glorifying behavior that is destructive to their future health, happiness and self-respect. Can you say Sarah Palin??? How much did we hear about how sexy she was versus what her policies were, even though she is a sitting governor??
My favorite quote from Liebau's book was the following: "So called sexual freedom is really just proclaiming oneself available for free, and therefore without value. To 'choose' such freedom is tantamount to saying that one is worth nothing." Which brings us back to our teenage girls who are sexting their boyfriends. They have bought into this lie, but haven't dealt with the logical conclusion that their behavior communicates to others that they are worth nothing . . . or maybe they believe about themselves on the front end anyway and that is why they do it? I don't know . . . but I would like to understand because the church has to counter attack this malicious frontal assault on our teenagers. Ideas anyone . . .
Todd Carnes
January 12, 2009
Prayer for the Alfords
January 6, 2009
Who cares what you are not?
Todd Carnes
Posted: 06 Jan 2009 04:36 AM CST While traveling, I listened to podcasts from three of the most well respected pastors in the U.S. All three started by explaining what their church was not. I’ll paraphrase what they said. Pastor One: “We never water down our message. We don’t preach a seeker sensitive message.” Pastor Two: “How many of you have been to boring, dead, traditional churches? Churches like that shouldn’t even exist! I’ve got some news for you! We’re not your grandma’s church!” Pastor Three: “We don’t preach topical-feel-good, entertainment sermons at this church. Most churches are into tickling ears and making people feel good about themselves, but that’s not us!” My Rant: I’m thrilled you are passionate about your style of teaching and church! It is very likely a true reflection of your gifts and calling. I pray God blesses your church in every way. But don’t build your church on what you’re not! If you do, you’re training the people at your church to believe your way is best and everyone else’s is inferior. Who cares what you’re not?! Be who you are without making others look like they are less. |
January 5, 2009
Valkyrie and The Cost of Discipleship
Anyone seen the film Valkyrie? I plan to see it as soon as I can make space in my schedule. I am intrigued with the film and the historical story behind it. As a pastor, I often reference the evil in our world and Nazism is an easy target for this. But this story reminds us that even in the midst of that horrendous evil in Nazi Germany, there were some men of honor, valor and courage. There were hundreds of men who banded together and felt a real responsibility to the Jews and others they didn't even know. They risked their own lives, and the lives of their wives and children to try and kill Hitler in order to save the lives of a bunch of strangers. I love bumping up against that hard truth because it presses me to ask the question of myself, "Would you step up and do something in that scenario or would you just let those others suffer and console yourself by saying there is nothing you can really do about it anyway?" I think we bypass so much good we could do in life by excusing ourselves under the false premise that it is not our responsibility. But if we are followers of Jesus and His ultimate plan is to redeem this planet from evil, then we must engage in every instance where we are given the opportunity to overcome evil.
Todd
December 29, 2008
Building Community
December 24, 2008
Getting Connected
As we work to build community in a world whic operates across miles of landscape on a daily basis these small groups can close that gap. As we long for relationships that go deep below the surface we are called to take risks among men and women we trust and who truly have our backs. As we strive to grow spiritually and overcome the parts of the world that try to master us your small group can help with the accountability you need to keep moving forward.
God did not design us to walk alone. Get connected in 2009.